Teach Your Children Well

Last night we went to a public place to watch a public event. Upon arriving we set up our family's little area, laying out blankets, setting up a food table, setting up camp chairs, etc. Making a little space for ourselves amongst all the other people who were making spaces for themselves. To our left was, what appeared to be, a large family reunion type group with many, many children ranging in age from new born to older teens.

As we were setting up the children from this large group kept walking through our family space. I don't mean sort of through the edges, I mean THROUGH it. over our blankets, moving our chairs out of their way, through our eating area, etc. We weren't in the path, in fact, not four feet away from our space was a large sidewalk - at least 4 - 6 feet wide - plenty of space.

My kids got annoyed by this before I did (which, these days is pretty tough to do since EVERYTHING annoys me). My kids would come up and say, "mom, isn't it rude that they're walking through our stuff?" We then all sat down to eat and these other kids continued to walk through our meal time. We started asking them, to please go around. At NO point did the parents try to correct their children and tell them its rude to walk through our stuff and over our blankets.

Finally, my 14 year old took matters into her own hands. She went to the car, got out the duct tape and taped off a space - a sort of wall if you will - to prevent the kids from walking through. As she did this, the parents next to us gave us weird looks as if we were mildly crazy - perhaps, but only being driven crazy by your children who have, obviously been taught no manners.

Guess, what? the tape didn't work, the kids would then go UNDER the tape - instead of side stepping a few feet to go on the sidewalk - and walk through our area, over our blankets where we're eating and relaxing, etc. So, at one point a child stopped, looked at Stasia and Stasia said "go around" he looked at her again, and walked right across the blanket. Nate and I both said "can you go around?" And at this point the mother of the child jumped all over us telling us what horrible people we are and to not talk to her children, EVER! "How can you even come out of the house?" She shouts at me when I tell her we've asked her children for hours to go around and not walk on our stuff. "I don't get why it's such a big deal" She shouts. Things got out of hand and I was about to jump up and slap the woman if Nate hadn't calmed me down (don't mess with the pregnant woman)

She doesn't think it's a big deal that her children have absolutely no respect for people or things around them? That, as a result of her children's bad behavior and lack of respect for others, we had to barricade ourselves into a small space in an attempt to keep children (and mind you, the children who were walking through were NOT The little ones - they were anywhere from 7 - 10 and should have known better).

Now I'm left wondering about parenting - I freely admit that I'm a strict parent. My children have certain expectations about manners and decency, especially when in public. But at what point have parents stopped telling their children "no"? At what point have parents stopped teaching their children how to be polite? At what point have parents stopped teaching their children to respect people and to respect others' things? At what point have parents decided that their children are infallible and stopped disciplining them?

I then found this article last night. http://www.babble.com/mom/work-family/parenting-style-controlling-parents-child-discipline/ And it appears that this, indeed, was not an anomaly, but, rather the trend in child rearing. And a trend that, I for one, find appalling.

However, I do try to teach my kids to accept their own responsibility in events and to examine how their actions led to the break down in communication or whatever so, I must do the same. Should I have mentioned something to the parents before hand? Yes, perhaps I should have. Should I have asked the parents to ask their children to not walk through our stuff? Yup, I failed in that arena as well. But, on the other had, it was going on for TWO HOURS and the parents were oblivious to their childrens behavior and that frustrates me even more than the poor behavior of the children - how can the children learn when the parents don't seem to care?

Stupid Things About Being Pregnant - TMI? - Not for the Weak of Heart

Let me forewarn all readers that what follows may be considered TMI by some people. I don't often hesitate about speaking my mind and to me, often times, nothing is off limits - and at the end of the day this is my blog and these are things that are happening in my life right now and it's all so new to me that I have to share it somehow. Also, just because I'm listing the stupid things, don't think that I'm not excited and totally in love with the idea of giving birth - just not always in love with all the changes going on in my body.

There's your warning so if you continue reading you may be doing so at your own risk.

As most of you know by now, I'm expecting my first baby. This is a long-awaited event for me and I'll be 37 by the time baby comes along but Nate (who will be 39 and it'll be his first as well) are both very excited about this event. In preparation for baby to arrive I, being of the digital age, have joined an online support group for women who are due in September and are over the age of 35 (that being the age when a woman becomes an "elderly pregnancy" lol - who knew I would be elderly already?)

Anyway, on this board to which I belong the women have been compiling a list of "Stupid Things About Being Pregnant". We're all just entering our second tri-mester so this is a list thus far in our pregnancies - I'm sure it'll expand as the months carry on.


1. Strangers will, unprovoked, tell you ridiculously personal things (“With my second child, I needed 16 stitches to sew my perineum back up!”). Labor horror stories and unsolicited parenting advice come a close second.
2. Strangers will, unprovoked, ask you ridiculously personal things (“Was this one planned? Were you trying?”). Your sex life becomes fair WikiLeaks fodder.
3. Get used to the “Is-she-pregnant-or-just-fat?” stare. If the observer decides "pregnant," you become an object of fascination.



4. If you tell someone you're pregnant, they will look at your belly. They will not be able to tear their eyes away; they must stare at your belly.
5. For you, it’s a miracle. For the ultrasound tech, it’s a yawn. Don’t be surprised if she is busy texting while you listen to your child’s heartbeat for the first time. True story.
6. When a husband goes to obstetrics, he might be treated like a wife at a car dealership: i.e. ignored, patronized, and excluded.
7. You become part of a weird club that measures everything in weeks when normal people would count in months. (After birth, you’ll be marking time in months while normal people are counting in years.)
8. Innocuous things will now seem more dire than they really are. For example, if you are enjoying a nice long bath and the pipes run out of hot water and you call out for your husband to please boil some water and fetch some clean towels—well, he might take it the wrong way.
9. Everything smells disgusting. You will smell weirdly specific things like shredded lettuce from a few hundred feet away. You can tell what brand deodorant other people use.
10. If you get morning sickness after eating something, you will never want to look at that food ever again. (Sorry, chicken.)
11. Exactly at the time when food seems most disgusting, pregnancy books will keep reminding you of it: “Your baby is now the size of an olive/strawberry/kumquat (what exactly IS a kumquat?).” “Aren’t you excited about your little butterbean/nugget/peanut?”
12. Cravings are for real. You will send your husband out with specific instructions to buy you a waffle cone. (“What do you mean what flavor ice cream? I want my waffle cone raw.”)
13. Any food or drink that ever brought you joy is now forbidden. A “wine and cheese party” is now just a “… party.”
14. You will narrow your eyes at your husband and wish he was a male seahorse. That would be awesome.
15. You will also feel jealous of marsupials. And birds (you’re good at sitting).
16. Toxic Gas! Need I say more?



17. You will buy a body pillow to help you sleep at night. You will name it Salma Hayek so neither you nor your husband will want to kick it out of bed.
18. You will feel a strange excitement when your embryo officially becomes a fetus, because that means that if some deranged lunatic killed you, he would legally be charged with TWO homicides, and you shall be doubly avenged.
19. Pregnancy message boards mean learning all new acronyms--forget any you thought you knew before. Otherwise, you'll read: "I'm a Female-To-Male and my Designated Hitter is ecxited about our new Designated Driver!"
20. Never offer an opinion or commentary on anyone’s choice of baby name. It doesn’t matter if they’re planning to spell “Mary” with 2 Ys and a silent K, or if they tell you they like “Effluvia” for a girl and “Midden” for a boy, they’re probably going to go ahead with it no matter what you say.
21. As soon as you finish dinner, you start thinking about breakfast. As soon as you finish breakfast, it's "hmm wonder what's for lunch?" and so on.
22. It is the only time in your life when I think you spend as much time in the bathroom to pee as you do sleeping.
23. Strangers, or anyone for that matter, think it's ok to touch or rub your pregnant belly! It's like cute belly=invitation to touch. My obgyn said this idea always amazes him how personal space is invaded...I mean, you wouldn't walk up to someone and grab their crotch "How you doin'?"...and we're not dogs...we don't need to sniff heineys...so rubbing bellies without permission? No thank you.



24. Sleeping does not make you less tired – you can sleep all day long and still be exhausted at 8:00 pm.
25. You have the attention span of a … oooo….what’s that? – Shiny!
26. The reason pregnant women "glow" is because all of those hormones surging through the body make every inch of our bodies and hair oily oily oily. It's not a glow you're seeing - it's the inability to decrease the amt of oil our bodies are producing.
27. You know you're going to be violently ill - you can feel it - but you also know that if you don't empty your bladder first there's going to be an even bigger mess to clean up afterward.


This is the list so far - have you been pregnant? What would YOU add?

A New Meaning to a Familiar Song

Just heard this song today for the millionth time - took on a whole new meaning to me this time...

I'm not surprised
Not everything lasts
I've broken my heart so many times
I stopped keeping track
Talk myself in
I talk myself out
I get all worked up
Then I let myself down

I tried so very hard not to lose it
I came up with a million excuses
I thought I thought of every possibility

And I know someday that it'll all turn out
You'll make me work so we can work to work it out
And I promise you kid that I'll give so much more than I get
I just haven't met you yet

I might have to wait
I'll never give up
I guess it's half timing
And the other half's luck
Wherever you are
Whenever it's right
You'll come out of nowhere
And into my life

And I know that we can be so amazing
And baby your love is gonna change me
And now I can see every possibility

And somehow I know that it'll all turn out
And you'll make me work so we can work to work it out
And promise you kid I'll give so much more than I get
I just haven't met you yet

They say all's fair in love and war
But I won't need to fight it
We'll get right
And we'll be united

And I know that we can be so amazing
And being in your life is gonna change me
And now I can see every single possibility

And someday I know it'll all turn out
And I'll work to work it out
Promise you kid I'll give more than I get
Than I get
Than I get
Than I get

Oh you know it'll all turn out
And you'll make me work so we can work to work it out
And promise you kid to give so much more than I get
Yeah I just haven't met you yet

I just haven't met you yet
Oh promise you kid to give so much more than I get

(I said love love love love love love love love)
I just haven't met you yet
(Love love love love love love)
Such a good day yeah
I just haven't met you yet